Do Throw Pillows Serve a Purpose?
Marital Success and its Relation to the Open Concept Floor Plan
So I was in the kitchen one eve drinking an adult beverage, preparing dinner and watching an Alabama football game. My husband came in and turned the game down and started talking to me. I got annoyed. I know my annoyance threshold is generally low, but this was a legitimate annoyance. I was participating in a wifely domestic activity all the while watching football, something typically enjoyed by most men. And I am a girl born and raised in Alabama. Our state flower is a football and we like football as much as men. I put my drink down and meal preparation ceased. I asked him to turn the TV up because I could no longer hear the game. To which he replied, “Oh, I turned it down so we could talk.” During my long pause and crickets chirping, my drinking and meal prep resumed all while my mind was being flooded with questions such as “Really? Right now? Is game time really the best time for intimate conversation?” I finally formed a good question to liken my chances of being able to watch the game without being distracted with unnecessary chatter. “I won’t be able to give you my undivided attention during the game. Can we talk later when you will have my full attention?” Needless to say, I got to watch the game uninterrupted. In fairness to my husband, he does like football, just not Alabama football. He had already watched LSU play that week.
And on yet another side note, does anyone ever wonder if it was a man or a woman who came up with idea of an open concept floor plan, a home where the kitchen opens up to/looks over the den? This is a question I have pondered many times because I can see it going either way.
The male idea: I can watch TV sporting events year round while my wife is in the kitchen cooking. I will be meeting her need for quality time because we will practically be in the same room together. I can gaze into her eyes from across the room during commercials. And an added bonus, I can meet her need for words of affirmation. The words I yell at the screen can serve a dual purpose. “Yes! Keep it going! Great move!” work for encouraging the star quarterback and my wife in cooking my favorite recipe.
The female idea: I can cook meals at the same time I am watching The Bachelor or The Notebook. I will be meeting his need for acts of service. As an added bonus, I can meet his need for physical touch. Since he will be nearby watching TV with me (i.e. sleeping in the recliner), I can easily pat him on the hand or pinch his face while I am covering him with a blanket or when I freshen up his drink.
So, surely you can see my dilemma in determining man or woman idea.
Book reference: The Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman.